The food and the feast
Start with the food, because nobody needs warming up to have an opinion about roast potatoes and because none of these questions require anyone to say a word about a relative. By the time you reach the rounds that do involve actual family members, the table will already be arguing happily, which is exactly the state you want it in.
Two house rules make this work. Nobody may answer both, and nobody may answer for anybody else. Read the question, pause, then take one sentence from every person in turn before a single word of debate is allowed. If you let the first person justify themselves straight away you will spend twenty minutes on the sprouts and never reach the pudding. The follow-up line printed under each question is there for after everybody has committed, to push the fence-sitters into a reason.
One more thing worth saying out loud before you begin: this round is about the food, never about the cook. Every question below is written so that liking or loathing a dish says nothing about whoever carried it to the table. If you want a winner, appoint somebody to tally the sides, and by the end of the round you will have a strange and fairly accurate map of your family's tastes.
Q1.Would you rather have a Christmas dinner of every side dish you love and no main course at all, or a perfect main course served entirely on its own?Tap to reveal
Answer: No bread, no gravy, no negotiating. Sides voters have to name their five, in order, right now.
The sides win at almost every table, and the people defending the main course are usually the ones who are going to have to carve it.
Q2.Would you rather give up roast potatoes forever or give up pigs in blankets forever?Tap to reveal
Answer: Whichever you sacrifice, you still have to sit and watch everyone else eat it, cheerfully, for the rest of your life.
Roast potatoes win the vote and pigs in blankets win the volume, because there are only ever about three each and everybody knows it. Americans mostly meet the same thing as bacon-wrapped sausages or bacon-wrapped cocktail wieners.
Q3.Would you rather have turkey every Christmas for the rest of your life, or ham every Christmas for the rest of your life?Tap to reveal
Answer: You are also now in charge of cooking it. Say how you would do it, in one sentence, with no recipe.
Ham quietly wins more of these than people expect, and the turkey side almost always argues from tradition rather than from taste.
Q4.Would you rather never eat a Brussels sprout again, or eat three sprouts with every single meal in December?Tap to reveal
Answer: Three with breakfast counts as a meal. Sprout voters have to say honestly whether they mean it or are just being brave.
Adults split cleanly and children do not split at all, and there is always one person who announces that sprouts are delicious now and is not entirely wrong: the bitter compounds really were bred down in the 1990s.
Q5.Would you rather eat a whole tin of chocolates by yourself but have to finish every single one, including the ones nobody wants, or be allowed exactly two and they are chosen for you?Tap to reveal
Answer: The tin has to be finished before midnight. The two are handed to you with no swap.
Everyone takes the tin, and then somebody remembers the strawberry creams and the room starts to change its mind.
Q6.Would you rather have gravy that never runs out but is always slightly too cool, or gravy that is perfect and there is one spoonful each?Tap to reveal
Answer: One spoonful means one. You choose what it goes on and you cannot change your mind afterwards.
The spoonful wins with anyone who has ever made gravy from the pan and the endless jug wins with everybody else, which usually means the cook is outvoted.
Q7.Would you rather have a gingerbread house you may eat the moment it is finished, or one that stays perfect and untouched on the sideboard until New Year?Tap to reveal
Answer: Eaters have to start with the roof, in front of whoever built it. Keepers may not take so much as a doorframe.
Children vote to eat it and adults vote to keep it, and the keepers are quietly hoping somebody else breaks first.
Q8.Would you rather drink only hot chocolate for the whole of December or only eggnog?Tap to reveal
Answer: Every hot drink you are offered for a month becomes your choice. No tea, no coffee, no exceptions.
Hot chocolate wins comfortably and the eggnog voters are usually making a point about being the only person in the room who actually likes it.
Q9.Would you rather have a Christmas pudding brought in flaming and dramatic, or a dessert everybody actually asks for second helpings of?Tap to reveal
Answer: Pudding voters have to do the lighting, in front of everyone, first time, with the lights off.
The spectacle wins the vote and loses the plate, and somebody will point out that a pudding only catches at all because the brandy is warmed first. They are right.
Q10.Would you rather have mince pies with no cream, or a bowl of brandy butter with nothing to put it on?Tap to reveal
Answer: You eat your choice in front of whoever baked, and you say something kind either way.
A mince pie divides a British table more sharply than almost anything else on it, and the people who love them are never quiet about it.
Q11.Would you rather eat the leftover sandwich on Boxing Day and never the dinner itself, or the dinner and never a single leftover?Tap to reveal
Answer: Sandwich voters have to describe their exact build in order, including what touches the bread first.
The sandwich collects more votes than the meal does, and the people who choose it can always describe it in unreasonable detail.
Q12.Would you rather have a cheeseboard at the end of the meal or a second dessert?Tap to reveal
Answer: One or the other comes out, not both, and whoever loses has to carry the winner to the table.
This splits by age almost perfectly, and the cheese side always argues that they are still going at eleven o'clock, which is true.
Q13.Would you rather have a chocolate advent calendar with twenty-four tiny chocolates, or one enormous chocolate on the twenty-fifth?Tap to reveal
Answer: Calendar voters may not eat ahead. Single-chocolate voters have to wait with an empty wall all month.
The daily one wins easily, which tells you that the ritual is doing more work than the chocolate is.
Q14.Would you rather have a huge Christmas breakfast and a small dinner, or nothing at all until the meal itself?Tap to reveal
Answer: Fasters may not pick at the kitchen. Breakfast voters have to eat everything they are given at one in the afternoon anyway.
Everyone votes for the breakfast and then somebody asks what happens to the appetite, and about a third of the room quietly changes sides.
Q15.Would you rather have roast parsnips and no carrots, or carrots and no parsnips?Tap to reveal
Answer: Whoever wins the vote decides what goes on top of the survivor, forever. Honey, herbs or nothing.
Parsnips are the sleeper hit of a Christmas plate and this is often the question where a quiet person at the table turns out to have very strong views.
Q16.Would you rather eat only red and green food for a whole week, or only food shaped like a Christmas tree?Tap to reveal
Answer: You have to name today's three meals under your rule before anybody else answers.
The colour rule sounds easier until somebody works out what is actually red or green, and the tree shape sounds impossible until somebody says sandwich.
Q17.Would you rather have a trifle with a layer nobody can identify, or a yule log that is mostly icing?Tap to reveal
Answer: You get one slice or one spoon and you have to say something generous about it out loud.
The mystery layer is the funnier answer and the yule log is the one that empties, and there is always one trifle loyalist prepared to defend the jelly.
Q18.Would you rather have stollen every year or panettone every year?Tap to reveal
Answer: Whichever you choose arrives in a box far too large for it and lives on top of the fridge until February.
Most tables have never voted on this and enjoy it for exactly that reason, and the marzipan question inside the stollen usually causes a second, smaller argument.
Q19.Would you rather find an orange in the bottom of your stocking, or a net of chocolate coins?Tap to reveal
Answer: Whatever you pick is the only edible thing in there, and you have to look pleased about it.
The coins win with everyone under thirty and the orange wins with anyone whose grandparents explained why it used to be there, which makes this the warmest question in the round.
Q20.Would you rather have your whole house smell of mulled spices all December with nothing to drink, or have the drink and no smell in the house at all?Tap to reveal
Answer: The smell version includes your coat, your hair and the car. Name one place you would not want it.
The smell wins, and it wins by more than anybody predicts, which is a useful thing to know about what people are actually buying in December.
Q21.Would you rather decorate twenty biscuits badly and eat them, or have twenty perfect ones you are not allowed to touch?Tap to reveal
Answer: Bad decorators have to hold theirs up and explain what it was meant to be.
Almost everybody picks the messy ones, and the handful who choose the perfect tray are usually the same people who own a piping bag.
Q22.Would you rather have Christmas cake with an inch of marzipan and icing, or a plain fruit cake with neither?Tap to reveal
Answer: You eat one slice a day until it is gone, and it is a big cake.
Marzipan is the most reliably divisive ingredient at any Christmas table, and this question exists mainly to find out who at yours has been lying politely for years.
Q23.Would you rather have a candy cane that never gets smaller, or a bag of gingerbread that refills itself?Tap to reveal
Answer: The cane stays sticky. The bag is always exactly as warm as it was the first time.
The gingerbread wins on flavour and the endless cane wins with children who immediately understand how long a real one lasts.
Q24.Would you rather be the person who cooks the whole meal and eats it sitting down last, or the person who eats first and cannot help with anything at all?Tap to reveal
Answer: Cooks eat alone at the end. Non-cooks have to sit still and watch, with no offering to carry anything.
The forced idleness is far more uncomfortable than people expect, and this is the question that usually makes somebody thank the cook without being asked to.
Q25.Would you rather eat a perfect Christmas dinner in total silence, or an ordinary one with the best conversation of the year?Tap to reveal
Answer: Silence means silence, for the whole meal, including the pulling of crackers.
Nearly everyone picks the conversation and then spends a minute working out how much of the meal they actually taste, which is a good note to end the food round on.
Presents, giving and getting
This is the round to run while the wrapping paper is still on the floor, because everybody has just had the experience the questions are about. It is also the round that goes wrong fastest if you are not careful, so one rule matters here more than anywhere else on the page: no question is about a real present anybody in the room gave or received. Not once, not as a joke. Keep it hypothetical and the round is warm; point it at an actual gift and you have ruined an afternoon.
Nothing below involves what anything cost, which is deliberate. Price is the least interesting thing about a present and the fastest way to make a child or a guest feel small. The questions are about timing, ritual, surprise, effort and the small indignities of wrapping, which are the parts everybody genuinely has views on.
Run it the same way as the food round: an answer from everyone before any debate, then the follow-up line to force a reason out of the undecided. If you have children in the room, put them first. They answer honestly and at speed, and it gives the adults permission to stop being reasonable.
Q1.Would you rather open every present on Christmas Eve, or every present on Christmas morning?Tap to reveal
Answer: No splitting the difference and no one small exception. Whichever you pick is now the family rule for twenty years.
Christmas morning wins in Britain and America and loses badly almost everywhere in continental Europe, so if your family has any German, Polish or Scandinavian branch this question stops being hypothetical and gets interesting fast.
Q2.Would you rather receive one present you will use every day for ten years, or twelve presents you will enjoy enormously and forget by March?Tap to reveal
Answer: Twelve-present voters have to open them one at a time with everybody watching, which takes an hour.
People vote for the one and describe the twelve, and the way they describe them tells you which they actually wanted.
Q3.Would you rather know exactly what you are getting a month in advance, or have no idea at all about anything?Tap to reveal
Answer: Knowing means knowing everything, including the disappointing one. Not knowing means you may not hint, ask or look.
The surprise wins the vote and the knowers are usually the people who hate not being able to plan, which is a real split and not a joke one.
Q4.Would you rather wrap forty presents beautifully by hand, or receive everything you are given in a plain gift bag forever?Tap to reveal
Answer: Forty means forty, with ribbon, in one sitting, and nobody helps.
The wrapping gets voted for in principle and abandoned around present nine, and the bag defenders always turn out to be the ones who have done the forty.
Q5.Would you rather be the best gift-giver in your family and always receive slightly wrong presents, or receive perfect presents every year and always give slightly wrong ones?Tap to reveal
Answer: You cannot tell anyone which side you chose, and you have to keep it up for life.
This is the best question in the round. Most people pick giving, and then somebody points out that they have just volunteered for a lifetime of polite faces and half of them switch.
Q6.Would you rather give a present you made yourself that took a month, or receive one?Tap to reveal
Answer: Makers have to say what they would make. Receivers have to say where they would put it.
Almost everybody wants to give the handmade thing and almost nobody wants to be handed one, which is worth saying out loud in a room full of people planning presents.
Q7.Would you rather do Secret Santa knowing exactly who has your name, or never find out who gave you anything?Tap to reveal
Answer: The anonymous version is permanent. You will wonder about it in ten years.
Anonymity wins with a big group and knowing wins with a small one, because in a family of six the secret never survives the afternoon anyway.
Q8.Would you rather receive the perfect present three weeks late, or something merely fine that is under the tree on the day?Tap to reveal
Answer: The late one arrives with an apology note you have to read out. The on-time one you have to use immediately.
Adults take the perfect late present and children will not even consider it, and neither side can understand the other at all.
Q9.Would you rather be given socks every single year by somebody who clearly thought about you, or nothing at all by somebody who simply forgot?Tap to reveal
Answer: Twenty years of socks. You have to look genuinely pleased each time, and you have to mean it.
The socks win overwhelmingly and the round goes quiet for a second, which is the point of including it.
Q10.Would you rather be allowed to open one present early in secret, or shake and squeeze every single one but open nothing?Tap to reveal
Answer: Shakers get thirty seconds per parcel and must announce a guess for each.
The shaking wins and it wins because it is a game, whereas the secret opening is just an ending arriving early.
Q11.Would you rather open presents one at a time while everybody watches your face, or all at once in a five-minute free-for-all?Tap to reveal
Answer: One at a time means reactions, out loud, for all of them. The free-for-all means nobody sees what anybody gave.
The scrum wins with anyone under twelve and loses with everybody who bought the presents, which is the whole argument in one sentence.
Q12.Would you rather have to correctly guess what a present is before you are allowed to open it, or open every present blindfolded?Tap to reveal
Answer: One guess each, and a wrong guess means it waits until tomorrow.
The blindfold sounds sillier and gets picked, until somebody imagines being handed something fragile and asks who is responsible.
Q13.Would you rather have wrapping paper so well taped that it takes five minutes a parcel, or no wrapping at all and everything just handed over?Tap to reveal
Answer: Five minutes each, no scissors, and everybody has to wait for you.
The taping wins, which proves the point that the wrapping is most of the present, and there is always one person who votes for no paper on tidiness grounds alone.
Q14.Would you rather give someone exactly what they asked for, or something they never thought of that turns out to be better?Tap to reveal
Answer: You commit to one strategy for every person on your list, forever. No mixing.
Everyone votes for the inspired choice and everyone has also been on the receiving end of somebody else's inspired choice, and that memory turns about a quarter of the room around.
Q15.Would you rather be given a musical instrument you cannot play, or a board game with rules nobody can understand?Tap to reveal
Answer: You have to attempt yours in front of the room before the day is over.
The game wins because it is at least a shared problem, and the instrument is picked by the two people at the table who have secretly always wanted an excuse.
Q16.Would you rather everybody in the family get the exact same present, or everybody pull a random one out of a pile with no names on it?Tap to reveal
Answer: No swapping afterwards in either version. None.
The random pile is much funnier and the identical present is much fairer, and which one a family picks says a lot about how it usually runs.
Q17.Would you rather be the person who has all their shopping finished in October, or the person who finds the perfect thing at four in the afternoon on Christmas Eve?Tap to reveal
Answer: October voters may not buy one single extra thing after the first of November.
The late finders are proud of it in a way the early ones never are, and this is the question where two completely opposed personalities each declare victory.
Q18.Would you rather write thank-you notes for everything you received, or send none and know that two people are quietly waiting?Tap to reveal
Answer: Every note is handwritten and a real sentence about the actual present.
The notes win the vote and lose the week, and everybody knows it, which is why the laughter comes half a second late.
Q19.Would you rather be given something you will use constantly and never think about, or something you will look at on a shelf for thirty years?Tap to reveal
Answer: Name the shelf. Name the room the shelf is in.
The shelf wins more often than you would expect, because people are choosing to be reminded of the giver rather than to own a useful object.
Q20.Would you rather quietly keep a present you do not like forever, or say so kindly on the day and be helped to change it?Tap to reveal
Answer: Honesty means saying it out loud, in front of everyone, in a way that does not land badly. Try the actual sentence now.
Most people vote to keep it and then cannot produce the honest sentence when asked, which is exactly the small useful discovery this question is for.
Q21.Would you rather hide the presents somewhere so clever that you might not find them again, or somewhere easy that a determined child will find in November?Tap to reveal
Answer: If you lose them, they stay lost until next year. If they are found, you have to keep a straight face for a month.
Parents split right down the middle and everybody has a story, and the stories are better than the answers.
Q22.Would you rather be the one who hands out all the presents from under the tree, or the one who collects all the paper afterwards?Tap to reveal
Answer: The handler reads every label aloud. The collector may not start until the last parcel is open.
Handing out looks like the better job and is a surprising amount of work, and the paper collector gets ten quiet minutes that the rest of the room does not.
Q23.Would you rather be given a whole day out with someone you love, or an object you get to keep?Tap to reveal
Answer: The day out is scheduled for February and cannot be moved. The object never leaves the house.
The day wins the vote easily and the object wins the follow-up question about what they would actually rather have received last year.
Q24.Would you rather be given the same present by three different people, or one present that is obviously being passed on from somebody else's Christmas?Tap to reveal
Answer: You open all three in front of all three. Or you open the one and say thank you properly.
The triple wins because it is nobody's fault, and there is always somebody who argues that a passed-on present is fine if it suits you better, and they have a point.
Q25.Would you rather be in charge of all the Santa presents for every child in the house, or be the one who has to answer all the difficult questions about how it works?Tap to reveal
Answer: The questions come from a seven-year-old who has clearly already discussed this with somebody at school.
The logistics win by a mile, because the questions are the genuinely hard job and everybody who has done it knows.
Decorations and the tree
Decorations are the safest ground on this page and the funniest, because every household has a settled position it has never had to defend out loud. Ask a family whether the lights should be white or coloured and you will discover that somebody has been giving way for fifteen years without ever saying so.
This round is the one to use while you are actually decorating. Read a question between boxes, take answers from everyone including whoever is up the ladder, and you will get through the job faster than in silence. It also works as a phone round for people who are not in the room yet: send one question a day through December and the answers come back immediately, which is more than most family group chats manage.
Keep the rule that nobody may answer both, and add one more for this round: nobody may say that the way their own house does it is objectively correct. They may argue for it, at length, with reasons. They may not simply assert it. That single restriction is what turns twenty-five decorating questions into an actual game.
Q1.Would you rather have a real tree that drops needles into every corner of the house, or an artificial one you have to store for eleven months of the year?Tap to reveal
Answer: Real-tree voters are on vacuuming duty until February. Artificial voters have to say exactly where the box lives.
This is the oldest argument in Christmas and it splits almost exactly in half, and the real-tree side always mentions the smell within ten seconds.
Q2.Would you rather have multicoloured lights or plain white lights, on every tree you ever own?Tap to reveal
Answer: One choice for life. You may not have a second tree with the other kind, and no, not in the hallway either.
Coloured lights win with children and with anybody remembering their own childhood, white lights win with whoever bought them, and the room divides by generation more cleanly than on any other question here.
Q3.Would you rather have a tree that is beautifully colour-coordinated, or a tree covered in mismatched ornaments that all mean something?Tap to reveal
Answer: Coordinated voters have to put the handmade ones in a box and explain the decision to whoever made them.
The sentimental tree wins the vote and the designed tree wins the photograph, and it is the one question where people admit they want both.
Q4.Would you rather put the decorations up on the first of December, or on Christmas Eve itself?Tap to reveal
Answer: No cheating with a wreath, a candle or one string of lights in the window.
The first of December wins easily now, and the late camp is usually one person with a very specific reason that is worth hearing.
Q5.Would you rather take everything down on Boxing Day morning, or leave it all up until the middle of February?Tap to reveal
Answer: Boxing Day means before breakfast. February means the neighbours have noticed.
The tidy answer wins the vote and almost nobody actually does it, and somebody always mentions Twelfth Night, which is the traditional English date and lands on the fifth or sixth of January depending on who you ask.
Q6.Would you rather spend an hour untangling lights every year, or have a set that is always perfect but one bulb is out and you can never find which?Tap to reveal
Answer: The tangle is worse each year. The dead bulb is in a different place every time you look.
The tangle wins because it ends, and the people who choose the missing bulb are the ones who have already made peace with imperfection.
Q7.Would you rather have an angel on top of the tree or a star?Tap to reveal
Answer: Whoever wins the vote does the placing, on a chair, while everyone watches and comments.
This is a pure family-inheritance question and the answers almost always trace back to what was on top of the tree when the person answering was six.
Q8.Would you rather have tinsel on everything, or a strict no-tinsel household forever?Tap to reveal
Answer: Everything means the bannister, the pictures and the television. Nothing means nothing, including the one strand in the bathroom.
Tinsel is the most reliably unfashionable decoration there is, which is exactly why a third of the room will defend it loudly and the rest will pretend they never liked it.
Q9.Would you rather decorate the whole house alone and perfectly, or with six enthusiastic helpers and a result you would not have chosen?Tap to reveal
Answer: Alone means nobody may watch or comment. With help means you may not quietly move anything later.
Everyone says the helpers and half the room is lying, and the tell is whoever hesitates before answering.
Q10.Would you rather have the most spectacular lights on your street, or one single candle in the window and nothing else at all?Tap to reveal
Answer: Spectacular means a switch-on time, an audience and people slowing down outside. The candle means somebody asks if you are away.
The candle gets more votes than you expect once somebody mentions strangers parking outside the house, and the spectacle side never once considers that.
Q11.Would you rather have a tree so tall the top bends against the ceiling, or a tiny one on a table that everybody can see properly?Tap to reveal
Answer: The tall one takes the whole corner and you have to get it through the door.
The enormous tree wins on ambition and the table tree wins with anybody who has ever carried a nine-foot fir upstairs.
Q12.Would you rather have a cat that climbs the tree every single day, or a dog that drinks the water out of the stand?Tap to reveal
Answer: The cat brings the tree down once a season. The dog does it quietly and you find out later.
The dog is the safer answer and the cat is the funnier one, and anybody who has actually owned either will vote with real feeling.
Q13.Would you rather have an inflatable snowman in the front garden, or lights on the roof that you have to climb up and fit yourself?Tap to reveal
Answer: The snowman deflates every third night. The roof job is in the cold, in the dark, on a ladder, alone.
The snowman wins, and it wins faster once somebody says the word ladder out loud.
Q14.Would you rather have a whole Christmas village on the sideboard, or a model train running under the tree?Tap to reveal
Answer: You set it up, you maintain it, and small children will be reaching for it constantly.
The train wins with anyone who had one and the village wins with everyone else, and both sides underestimate how much dusting is involved.
Q15.Would you rather have a house that smells strongly of pine with no tree in it, or a beautiful real tree with no smell at all?Tap to reveal
Answer: The scent version is constant and comes from a bottle. You have to admit that to guests.
The real tree wins on principle and the smell wins on honesty, and it is worth noting that a lot of the pine scent people love genuinely is bottled, since a cut tree loses most of it within a week indoors.
Q16.Would you rather hang stockings that will definitely stay empty, or have no stockings at all?Tap to reveal
Answer: Empty means hung up, named, and still there on the morning of the twenty-sixth.
Nearly everyone picks no stockings, and the few who hang them anyway give the best reason you will hear all evening.
Q17.Would you rather collect snow globes for the rest of your life, or nutcrackers?Tap to reveal
Answer: One new one every year, chosen by somebody else, displayed where guests can see it.
Nutcrackers win because they look like a decision and snow globes win with anybody who has ever actually shaken one, which is everybody.
Q18.Would you rather have fake snow all over your house and garden, or real snow you are entirely responsible for clearing?Tap to reveal
Answer: Fake snow does not melt and gets into the carpet. Real snow means the path, the drive and the pavement outside.
The shovelling wins with adults and loses with everyone under fifteen, and this is the question most likely to produce a genuine argument about whether snow is nice.
Q19.Would you rather decorate somebody else's house exactly as you like, or have your own house decorated for you entirely to somebody else's taste?Tap to reveal
Answer: Neither version may be adjusted afterwards, not even slightly, not even the one thing.
The offer of a free result is very tempting for about four seconds, and then people picture one specific relative and change their minds.
Q20.Would you rather have Christmas crackers with jokes so bad they are painful, or a table with no crackers on it at all?Tap to reveal
Answer: Every joke must be read out in full, including the pause, and nobody may groan.
The bad jokes win unanimously, which is the only genuinely settled question in this round, and it is worth asking anyway because of how fast the room agrees.
Q21.Would you rather have paper chains a child made and stuck up crookedly, or a garland that looks like it came from a shop window?Tap to reveal
Answer: Whichever you choose is the only decoration on that wall, and the child is in the room.
Everybody chooses the paper chains, and the interesting moment is watching the one person who genuinely wanted the garland decide whether to say so.
Q22.Would you rather have the tree in the window facing out for the street, or facing into the room for the family?Tap to reveal
Answer: The decorated side gets one direction only. You cannot do both and you cannot turn it later.
Facing in wins the vote and facing out is what most houses actually do, which makes this a good question for catching a family out.
Q23.Would you rather be responsible for moving the Elf on the Shelf every single night without fail, or for filling a twenty-four-door advent calendar by hand?Tap to reveal
Answer: Forgetting the elf once means a child notices at seven in the morning. The calendar has to be finished before the first.
The calendar wins with anyone who has ever fallen asleep before moving the elf, and the elf enthusiasts are always the ones who have not tried it yet.
Q24.Would you rather have a wreath on the door that is fresh and dies by New Year, or one that lasts twenty years and never changes?Tap to reveal
Answer: The fresh one has to be replaced every year by you, in person, in the cold.
The lasting one wins on sense and the fresh one wins on feeling, and the split usually matches whoever does the Christmas shopping.
Q25.Would you rather keep every decoration your family has ever owned, or start completely fresh with a single matching set?Tap to reveal
Answer: Starting fresh means the old boxes go, all of them, including the ones you have not opened in a decade.
The clean start gets a few brave votes and then somebody names one specific ornament and the vote collapses, which is the best possible way to end this round.
Christmas films, songs and telly
This is the round that runs itself, because everybody already has a favourite and a thing they cannot stand. It is also the round where you will find out that two people in your family have never seen the film everyone else quotes at each other, which is usually worth more than the answers.
A note on how to use it. Unlike the other rounds, this one rewards a bit of noise: let people sing the line, let them do the impression, let the argument about whether a particular film counts as Christmas run for a minute before you move on. The follow-up lines here are written to escalate rather than settle, because a room arguing about Die Hard is a room having a good time.
If you are running this with a mixed-age group, be aware that the references split hard by decade. A twelve-year-old and a sixty-year-old will not have the same list, so use the questions that pit an era against an era and let each side explain itself. That is more fun than pretending everyone has seen the same films, and it is how you get a grandparent to describe a stop-motion reindeer to a teenager.
Q1.Would you rather settle the Die Hard argument forever by declaring it a Christmas film, or by declaring it definitively not one?Tap to reveal
Answer: Your ruling is permanent and binding on everyone in the room, and you have to give one reason that is not a joke.
The yes side has the setting and the tagline and the no side has the tone, and this question has never once been resolved at any table, which is precisely why it belongs first.
Q2.Would you rather watch Home Alone every Christmas forever, or Elf every Christmas forever?Tap to reveal
Answer: One film, every year, and you have to stay awake through all of it.
Home Alone wins with anyone who saw it in the nineties and Elf wins with everyone younger, and both sides think the other is missing something obvious.
Q3.Would you rather watch It's a Wonderful Life or a version of A Christmas Carol, if you could only ever see one again?Tap to reveal
Answer: You have to watch it with someone who has never seen it and not talk during it.
The Carol wins because there are so many versions to choose from, and somebody always argues for a particular one with real passion.
Q4.Would you rather hear All I Want for Christmas Is You once an hour every hour of December, or never hear it again as long as you live?Tap to reveal
Answer: Once an hour includes at night. Never again includes in shops, in cars and at other people's houses.
The vote goes to never and the singing starts anyway, and it is worth knowing that the song came out in 1994 and has been climbing back up the charts every December for decades.
Q5.Would you rather keep Last Christmas and lose Fairytale of New York, or the other way round?Tap to reveal
Answer: The loser is deleted from every recording in the world. Say goodbye properly.
This one splits by country as much as by taste, and if anybody in the room is Irish or from the north of England you already know which way they are going.
Q6.Would you rather watch one Christmas film twenty-five times in December, or twenty-five different ones once each?Tap to reveal
Answer: Twenty-five in a month means nearly one a day. You may not skip and you may not double up.
The variety wins the vote and the single film wins in practice in most houses, and everybody knows which film theirs would be.
Q7.Would you rather allow Christmas music from the first of November, or only on the twenty-fourth and twenty-fifth?Tap to reveal
Answer: Your rule applies to the whole household, in the car and in the kitchen, with no private exceptions.
This is the most reliably heated question in the round and the split has almost nothing to do with age, which makes it unusually hard to predict.
Q8.Would you rather sing a carol solo in front of your whole family, or listen to every single one of them sing a verse each?Tap to reveal
Answer: Soloists get one verse, unaccompanied, standing up. Listeners may not laugh, look away or leave the room.
Everybody picks listening and nobody has thought about how long it takes, which is the joke waiting at the end of the question.
Q9.Would you rather know all the words to every Christmas song but have a terrible voice, or have a beautiful voice and only ever know the chorus?Tap to reveal
Answer: You are singing at a party either way. Pick which failure happens in public.
The good voice wins comfortably, and the people who choose the lyrics are usually the ones who actually go carolling.
Q10.Would you rather watch The Muppet Christmas Carol or the animated Grinch, with a room full of children?Tap to reveal
Answer: Whichever you choose, you have to watch it with them and not on your phone.
The Muppets win with adults by a surprising margin and the children are fine with either, which is the real finding here.
Q11.Would you rather watch six made-for-television Christmas romances back to back, or have no television at all for the whole of Christmas week?Tap to reveal
Answer: Six in a row is about nine hours. No television means no television, including the sport.
The blackout gets a confident vote and then somebody mentions the afternoon of the twenty-fifth and the room reconsiders.
Q12.Would you rather know the ending of every Christmas film before you watch it, or never be allowed to finish one?Tap to reveal
Answer: Never finishing means the last ten minutes, every time, without fail.
Knowing the ending wins almost unanimously, and Christmas films are one of the only genres where that is true, because nobody watches them for the plot.
Q13.Would you rather have carol singers at your door every single evening in December, or never have a single one in your life?Tap to reveal
Answer: Every evening means answering, standing there and listening to all of it.
The nightly version is voted down fast and then one person says it would be lovely, and they are usually right and outnumbered.
Q14.Would you rather watch The Snowman with no words and that one song, or a Frosty cartoon with all the words and no silence?Tap to reveal
Answer: You watch your choice with a five-year-old who will ask questions throughout.
The Snowman wins with British voters and needs explaining to American ones, and Walking in the Air does most of the persuading either way.
Q15.Would you rather have Jingle Bells stuck in your head for all of December, or a song you genuinely love ruined forever by being a Christmas advert?Tap to reveal
Answer: The ruined song is one you name now, out loud, and it is gone for good.
Jingle Bells wins and it wins quickly, because nobody is willing to sacrifice a real song, and the question is really about how much people protect their own taste.
Q16.Would you rather be the person who knows all five verses of a carol, or the person who sings the chorus far too loudly and stops?Tap to reveal
Answer: Verse-knowers have to keep going when everybody else trails off after the first one.
The loud chorus wins on comedy and the five verses win on nerve, and every family has exactly one of each.
Q17.Would you rather wait all year for one Christmas advert you love, or have no Christmas adverts anywhere at all?Tap to reveal
Answer: No adverts means none, including the ones your family quotes at each other.
Britain votes to keep them and everybody else finds the question baffling, which is itself a useful thing to demonstrate at a mixed table.
Q18.Would you rather watch A Charlie Brown Christmas or a stop-motion Rudolph, if a child has to choose with you?Tap to reveal
Answer: You have to explain to them afterwards why that one is any good.
Charlie Brown wins with adults for the music and Rudolph wins with children for the misfit toys, and the explaining is the good part.
Q19.Would you rather watch a film while a relative explains everything that is about to happen, or in complete silence with no comment allowed at all?Tap to reveal
Answer: The commentary is affectionate, constant and completely accurate.
Silence wins by a landslide, and the one person voting for the commentary is always the person who provides it.
Q20.Would you rather have the perfect Christmas episode of a show you love, or one more Christmas film to add to the rotation?Tap to reveal
Answer: The episode is twenty-two minutes. The film is two hours and you have to convince the family to sit down for it.
The episode wins on practicality and the film wins on occasion, and the split maps almost exactly onto who is in charge of the remote.
Q21.Would you rather see The Nutcracker performed live once, or be able to watch a recording of it any time you like forever?Tap to reveal
Answer: Live is one evening, one seat, in December, and you have to travel to it.
The live performance wins the vote and the recording wins with anybody who has small children, and the Tchaikovsky is the deciding factor for both.
Q22.Would you rather have only instrumental Christmas music for the rest of your life, or only songs with words?Tap to reveal
Answer: Instrumental includes every shop and every lift. Words means every single one has a chorus somebody will join in with.
The instrumental side wins with anybody who has worked a December retail shift, and they always say so.
Q23.Would you rather be the family karaoke champion of exactly one Christmas song, or the person everybody wants to dance with?Tap to reveal
Answer: You have to perform your speciality tonight, and you may not choose a different one next year.
Dancing wins with adults and the song wins with teenagers, and it is the rare question where the teenagers are braver.
Q24.Would you rather be able to sing beautifully but only between the first and the twenty-fifth of December, or sing badly all year and not care at all?Tap to reveal
Answer: The December gift is obvious to everyone and disappears at midnight. Say where you would use it.
Not caring wins more votes than the gift does, which is a genuinely cheering thing to find out about a room.
Q25.Would you rather memorise the whole of The Twelve Days of Christmas in the correct order, or never again have to sit through anybody else attempting it?Tap to reveal
Answer: Memorising means performing it on demand, all twelve, with no prompting and no laughing.
Escape wins the vote and then somebody starts the song anyway, and the row about whether it is five gold rings or five golden rings arrives right on schedule.
Family, travel and the day itself
This is the round with real stakes in it, so it is the one to run once everybody is fed and comfortable rather than in the first ten minutes. Every question here is about logistics, timing and who does what, which is where the genuine differences in a family live. Handled well it is the warmest round on the page. Handled carelessly it is an argument.
The safeguard is simple and you should say it out loud before you start. Every question is hypothetical, and nobody may use an answer to make a point about a real arrangement, a real journey or a real relative in the room. The moment somebody says the name of a person who is present, the round is over. Kept general, these questions let people say things they have thought for years without anybody having to be the one who raised it.
It also travels, which is the other reason to keep it. Read these in the car on the way there, where nobody can leave, or on the way back, when everybody has just lived through the day and has opinions about it that will not survive until January. A long drive and twenty-five of these is a better use of the time than a playlist.
Q1.Would you rather host Christmas at your own house every single year, or never host again and always be a guest somewhere else?Tap to reveal
Answer: Hosts never travel and never get a day off. Guests never choose the food, the timing or the bed.
Hosting wins with people who like control and loses the second somebody says the word bed, and almost everybody at a table has strong private views about this already.
Q2.Would you rather have children who wake you at half past four in the morning, or children who sleep until ten and are not especially bothered?Tap to reveal
Answer: The early ones are awake and delighted for eighteen straight hours. The late ones open presents politely.
Every parent votes for the four-thirty version and every one of them winces doing it, which is the most honest moment in this round.
Q3.Would you rather split Christmas Day between two households with a drive in the middle, or pick one and see the other family a week later?Tap to reveal
Answer: Splitting means two full meals. Choosing means telling the other family which way you went.
The clean choice wins overwhelmingly in the abstract and almost nobody manages it in real life, and the reasons why are the interesting part.
Q4.Would you rather go for a two-hour walk in horizontal rain after lunch, or play a board game that takes three hours and ends badly?Tap to reveal
Answer: The walk has no shortcut. The game has to be finished properly, with a winner.
The walk wins with anyone over forty and the game wins with everyone else, and both sides are choosing the option that lets them avoid the other people.
Q5.Would you rather be the one who stays up until two in the morning assembling something with forty screws, or the one who has to read the instructions aloud the whole time?Tap to reveal
Answer: Neither of you may look at the picture on the box. One of you is definitely going to say something.
The reading job looks easier and is the one that causes the argument, and everybody who has done a Christmas Eve assembly knows which side they are on.
Q6.Would you rather take a one-hour video call with relatives you rarely see, or write them all a proper letter by hand?Tap to reveal
Answer: The call includes the part where nobody can hear anybody. The letter has to be a page and posted before the new year.
The letter wins the vote and the call wins in reality, and the people who choose the letter are usually the ones who actually would.
Q7.Would you rather the entire family wear matching pyjamas all day, or everybody dress properly for dinner with no exceptions?Tap to reveal
Answer: Photographs are taken either way and go to everyone who was not there.
Pyjamas win with children and with anyone hosting, and dressing up wins with the two people who secretly enjoy it, and this question finds them instantly.
Q8.Would you rather wear the most aggressive Christmas jumper in the house all day, or be the only person not wearing one at all?Tap to reveal
Answer: The jumper has a working battery in it. Not wearing one means you have to explain why, repeatedly.
The jumper wins easily, because being the odd one out at a family gathering is worse than being uncomfortable, and everybody knows that without needing to say it.
Q9.Would you rather be the person who takes every photograph all day, or the person who appears in every photograph and never takes one?Tap to reveal
Answer: Photographers are in none of them. Subjects have no say in any of them.
Taking the photographs wins the vote and then somebody points out that in twenty years there will be no pictures of them at all, and the room goes quiet for a second.
Q10.Would you rather sleep in your old childhood bedroom exactly as it was, or on a perfectly comfortable sofa bed in the living room?Tap to reveal
Answer: The bedroom is small and the mattress is original. The sofa bed means you are awake when the first person comes downstairs.
The childhood bedroom wins on feeling and loses on sleep, and the answers are always more sentimental than people intend them to be.
Q11.Would you rather have a quiet Christmas Eve with three people, or a house full of thirty and no room to sit down?Tap to reveal
Answer: The quiet one means nothing happens. The full one means you are on your feet all evening.
Christmas Eve is the one day where the quiet answer wins, which is interesting given how the same people vote on Christmas Day itself.
Q12.Would you rather be in charge of handing out the presents, or in charge of keeping a two-year-old happy through the entire meal?Tap to reveal
Answer: The two-year-old has had chocolate. You may not hand them to anybody else.
The presents win by a mile and the people who volunteer for the toddler are either very kind or very tired of adults.
Q13.Would you rather wake up to deep snow and roads you cannot leave, or clear roads and grey drizzle all day?Tap to reveal
Answer: Snowed in means whoever is in the house is who you have. Nobody arrives and nobody goes.
The snow wins immediately and then everybody works out who exactly is in the house with them, and about a third of the votes quietly move.
Q14.Would you rather have one genuinely white Christmas in your life, or a mild green one every year that never causes anybody any trouble?Tap to reveal
Answer: The one white Christmas is a single day and you do not get to choose which year.
The white Christmas wins overwhelmingly, and it is worth noting that a proper snow-covered twenty-fifth is rare in most of England and in much of the southern United States, which is part of why it is so valuable.
Q15.Would you rather have your birthday on Christmas Day, or on the second of January when everybody has gone home?Tap to reveal
Answer: Christmas Day means one set of presents. January means a phone call and nothing else.
January wins with everyone who does not have a December birthday and loses with everyone who does, and the people who actually have one should be allowed to speak last.
Q16.Would you rather have a Christmas Day that lasts forty-eight hours, or two completely separate Christmases in the same year?Tap to reveal
Answer: The long day has no sleep in it. The two Christmases mean doing all the cooking twice.
Two Christmases wins the vote until somebody mentions the cooking, and then the long day starts to look like the easier option.
Q17.Would you rather be the youngest cousin who gets away with everything, or the oldest who is put in charge of all the others?Tap to reveal
Answer: The oldest is responsible for every one of them for the whole afternoon, indoors, in a house with a tree in it.
The youngest wins overwhelmingly and the eldest children in the room always make a case for the authority, which nobody else believes for a moment.
Q18.Would you rather be in bed by nine on Christmas night, or still up talking at two in the morning?Tap to reveal
Answer: Nine means you miss whatever happens after nine. Two means you are up at seven anyway.
The late night wins with adults who no longer have small children and the early night wins with everybody who does, and the split is so clean it is almost a census.
Q19.Would you rather spend Christmas with twenty-five relatives in one loud house, or with three people somewhere completely quiet?Tap to reveal
Answer: Twenty-five means you will not finish a single conversation. Three means you will finish all of them by four o'clock.
The big house wins on the day and the quiet one wins in the retelling, and people over fifty almost always pick differently from people under thirty.
Q20.Would you rather write sixty Christmas cards by hand, or receive not a single one through the door all December?Tap to reveal
Answer: Sixty means individual sentences, not just a name. None means an empty mantelpiece.
The writing wins and it wins because of the mantelpiece, which tells you that cards are almost entirely about receiving them.
Q21.Would you rather travel on Christmas Day itself with empty roads, or travel on the twenty-seventh with everybody else?Tap to reveal
Answer: Christmas Day travel means missing part of it somewhere. The twenty-seventh means four hours in a queue.
The empty roads win with drivers and lose with anybody who has to arrive somewhere at a set time, and this is the most practical question on the page.
Q22.Would you rather be the relative who arrives with a car full of food and helps with nothing, or the one who arrives empty-handed and does every single job?Tap to reveal
Answer: You have to choose your role now and keep it for the whole visit without explaining yourself.
Doing the jobs wins the vote and arriving with the food is what most people actually do, and the gap between those two facts is the whole point of asking.
Q23.Would you rather have Christmas somewhere hot with a beach and no tradition at all, or at home in the cold with every single tradition intact?Tap to reveal
Answer: The hot version means no tree, no roast and no jumper. The cold version means no escape from any of it.
Home wins by a surprising margin in a mixed group, and the Australians and South Africans in any room will point out entirely reasonably that they manage both.
Q24.Would you rather be back at work on the twenty-seventh with a clear January, or have the whole fortnight off and a brutal first week back?Tap to reveal
Answer: You pick the shape of the whole month now and you live with it.
The fortnight wins the vote and the short break wins with anyone who has come back to a full inbox, and this is the question that turns a family table into a conversation about how people actually live.
Q25.Would you rather remember every Christmas of your life in perfect detail, or remember none of them but have one you could live again exactly as it was?Tap to reveal
Answer: You choose the year now, out loud, and you have to say who is in it.
This is the question that ends the round properly. Almost everybody picks the single year, and the year they name is almost never the one anybody else expects.
The silly round: reindeer, elves and total nonsense
Save this one, or start with it. Those are the two places it works. Starting with it loosens a room that does not know each other well, and saving it gives you somewhere to go when the meal has gone on for three hours and the conversation has flattened out. What it is not is a filler round: the questions are built the same way as the rest, with two options that are both genuinely bad or both genuinely wonderful.
This is the round that works best with children, because none of it requires having lived through twenty Christmases. A six-year-old can answer every question here with complete authority, and frequently with a better answer than the adults. If you have a mixed-age table, let the youngest person go first on all twenty-five and watch how often the grown-ups steal their reasoning.
The follow-up lines matter more here than anywhere else. A silly question with no consequence attached gets a shrug. The same question with one extra condition, such as naming the room or saying how long you would last, turns into a story. Read the second line every time, even when the answer looks obvious, because the obvious answers are where the good arguments are hiding.
Q1.Would you rather be a reindeer or an elf?Tap to reveal
Answer: Reindeer work one night a year in the cold. Elves work all year indoors. Say which shift you want.
The elves win with children and the reindeer win with adults, and the adults are all thinking about the eleven months off.
Q2.Would you rather ride in the sleigh for the whole of Christmas Eve night, or have Santa stay at your house for breakfast the next morning?Tap to reveal
Answer: The sleigh has no roof and no seatbelt. Breakfast means cooking for him and making conversation.
The ride wins with everyone under twelve and breakfast wins with anyone who has had a difficult house guest, which is a remarkably clean generational split.
Q3.Would you rather be able to get down any chimney, or never feel cold again for the rest of your life?Tap to reveal
Answer: The chimney power works on all chimneys, always, and there is no second use for it.
Never being cold is obviously the better power, so the fun is entirely in watching the people who pick the chimney try to justify it, and one of them always finds a good reason.
Q4.Would you rather be able to wrap any object perfectly in three seconds, or unwrap any parcel without tearing a single piece of paper?Tap to reveal
Answer: One power for life. You have to say what the first thing you would use it on is.
Wrapping wins on usefulness and unwrapping wins with the people who save the paper, and there are always more of those in a room than you think.
Q5.Would you rather grow antlers every December, or have a nose that glows softly red from the first to the twenty-fifth?Tap to reveal
Answer: Neither can be hidden and both go to work with you. Say how you would explain it on day one.
The nose wins because it fits under a hat and the antlers win with anyone who likes the idea of ducking through doorways, and somebody always asks whether the nose is useful in fog.
Q6.Would you rather build a snowman that comes alive for one day and then melts, or one that never melts and never moves?Tap to reveal
Answer: The living one knows it has a day. The permanent one is in your garden in August.
The one perfect day wins with almost everybody, and the handful who pick the permanent snowman usually mention August, which is fair.
Q7.Would you rather live inside a snow globe for a day, or be the one who gets to shake it?Tap to reveal
Answer: Inside means the weather happens to you. Outside means you can see them and they cannot hear you.
Being inside wins with children and being outside wins with anybody who thinks about it for five seconds, which makes this a good question for demonstrating the value of thinking about it for five seconds.
Q8.Would you rather be able to talk to Christmas trees, or know exactly what the cat thinks about the tree?Tap to reveal
Answer: The trees have opinions about being cut down. The cat has a plan.
The cat wins the laugh and the trees win the second vote once somebody points out what a tree might actually want to say.
Q9.Would you rather have a house made entirely of gingerbread, or one made entirely of wrapping paper?Tap to reveal
Answer: Gingerbread attracts things. Paper does not survive weather. You have to live in your choice for a year.
Gingerbread wins instantly and then somebody mentions rain, mice or the front door, and the paper house starts getting sympathy votes.
Q10.Would you rather be an elf who is genuinely terrible at making toys but loves the job, or a reindeer who cannot fly but is the fastest runner in the herd?Tap to reveal
Answer: Neither of you is going to be replaced. Say how you would spend your working day.
The happy bad elf wins with a warm and slightly surprising majority, and the reindeer voters are always the competitive ones in the family.
Q11.Would you rather be the only person who can hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve, or the only person in the world who cannot?Tap to reveal
Answer: You cannot prove it either way and nobody will believe you.
Hearing them wins, obviously, but the good part is that half the room hesitates before answering, because being the only one is lonely in both directions.
Q12.Would you rather have a fanfare play every time you open a door in December, or have snow fall gently indoors wherever you walk?Tap to reveal
Answer: The fanfare includes the bathroom door and the fridge. The snow settles and somebody has to clear it.
The indoor snow wins on beauty and the fanfare wins on comedy, and the fridge is what decides it in most rooms.
Q13.Would you rather have tinsel instead of hair for the whole of December, or fingertips that glow like fairy lights all year?Tap to reveal
Answer: The tinsel sheds. The lights cannot be switched off, including at night, including in the cinema.
The glowing fingers win until somebody mentions trying to sleep, and then the tinsel suddenly looks like the sensible option, which it is not.
Q14.Would you rather turn into a wooden nutcracker every night and back at dawn, or stay yourself but be exactly the height of a candy cane all December?Tap to reveal
Answer: The nutcracker cannot move or speak. The small version still has to go to work.
The nutcracker wins because it is only at night, and then somebody asks who is going to put you away, and the room reconsiders entirely.
Q15.Would you rather have Santa's ability to check a list and know everything about everybody, or his ability to visit every house in the world in one night?Tap to reveal
Answer: One power, used once a year, and you cannot explain to anyone how you did it.
The travelling wins with everybody who wants to see things and the list wins with everybody who wants to be right, and nobody in either camp is being subtle about it.
Q16.Would you rather have a pet robin that follows you everywhere and comments on your day, or a pet penguin that is silent and enormously loyal?Tap to reveal
Answer: The robin is honest. The penguin needs cold, space and a great deal of fish.
The penguin wins on affection and the robin wins on entertainment, and it is worth saying that the robin is the one you might actually see in a British garden in December while penguins live nowhere near the North Pole at all.
Q17.Would you rather jingle audibly every time you take a step, or be physically unable to speak in anything but rhyme for the whole of December?Tap to reveal
Answer: The jingling is loud enough that people turn round. The rhyming applies to phone calls and to arguments.
Rhyming wins with anybody who thinks they are quick and the jingling wins with everybody who has ever tried to be quick under pressure, and the second group is right.
Q18.Would you rather have a small personal snow cloud that follows you around, or a small personal choir that sings whenever you enter a room?Tap to reveal
Answer: The cloud snows on you specifically. The choir follows you into every shop and every lift.
The cloud wins because it is silent, and the people who pick the choir have not yet imagined arriving somewhere they want to be unnoticed.
Q19.Would you rather be a cracker joke that always lands perfectly, or a cracker that never opens no matter how hard anybody pulls?Tap to reveal
Answer: You have to tell your best actual cracker joke now, out loud, to decide whether you deserve the first option.
Everyone picks the joke and almost nobody can produce one on demand, which is the trap the question is built around.
Q20.Would you rather wear a Santa hat you can never take off, or never be allowed to wear any hat at all again in winter?Tap to reveal
Answer: The Santa hat is in every photograph for the rest of your life, including the serious ones.
The hat wins with people who do not mind being looked at and loses with everybody else, and the cold-ears argument arrives about twenty seconds in.
Q21.Would you rather grow a full white beard overnight on the first of December and lose it on the first of January, or have your reflection wave at you every time you pass a mirror in December?Tap to reveal
Answer: The beard is not optional and not trimmable. The reflection is friendly and completely silent.
The beard is funnier and the reflection is the one that stops being funny in the middle of the night, which everybody works out at about the same moment.
Q22.Would you rather be able to make it snow anywhere in the world once a year, or keep one room in your house perfectly warm forever?Tap to reveal
Answer: The snow is one hour, one place, chosen in advance. The warm room is the same room for life.
The snow wins on spectacle and the warm room wins by February, and the argument is always really about whether a power should be useful or fun.
Q23.Would you rather be an ornament on the family tree for one day a year, or the star on top for a whole year in a cupboard?Tap to reveal
Answer: As an ornament you can see and hear everything. As the star you are eleven months in a box.
The one day wins overwhelmingly, and the interesting answers come from whoever asks what you can see from the top of the tree.
Q24.Would you rather know what is inside any wrapped box just by touching it, or be able to make anybody love any present you give them?Tap to reveal
Answer: The touching works on everything, including boxes that are not for you. The other power works only once per person per year.
Most people pick the giving power and then somebody points out that it is a kind of cheating, and the room splits along a line it did not know it had.
Q25.Would you rather live in a village where it is always Christmas Eve, or one where it is always the twenty-seventh of December?Tap to reveal
Answer: Christmas Eve never arrives at the day. The twenty-seventh is quiet, leftover-fed and has nothing scheduled at all.
Christmas Eve wins with children and the twenty-seventh wins with a startling number of adults, who describe it as the best day of the year and then realise they mean it.
Frequently Asked Questions
How do you actually play would you rather at a table?
Read the question, pause, then take one answer from every person in turn before anybody is allowed to debate. That single rule is the difference between a game and a poll: let the first person explain themselves immediately and you will get three answers in half an hour. Once everyone has committed, use the follow-up line printed under the question, which exists to push the undecided off the fence and into a reason. A show of hands afterwards gives you a winning side, and the questions where a table splits down the middle are the ones worth letting run. Two more rules are worth stating out loud before you start: nobody may answer both options, and nobody may answer on behalf of somebody else.
How long does it take to get through 150 questions?
About three hours at a talkative table, which is more than any single gathering wants in one sitting. One round of twenty-five runs roughly thirty to forty minutes and is the right size for after a meal. The page is built in six separate rounds for exactly that reason: pick the round that suits the room you are in, and keep the rest for the drive, for Boxing Day, or for next year. If you have ten minutes rather than forty, take five questions from the silly round and stop while people still want more. On which round to open with: the food round if everybody knows each other, the silly round if they do not, and never the family and travel round, which wants a room that is already fed and comfortable.
What ages does this suit?
Six and up for the food, decorations and silly rounds, which need no knowledge of anything and work as well with a first-grader as with a grandparent. The presents round suits about eight and up. The family, travel and day-itself round lands properly from around twelve, because most of its questions depend on having sat through a few of these Christmases already. The films and songs round splits by decade rather than by age, which is a feature: let each generation explain its own list. Nothing on the page needs an adult to read it first.
Can I use this in a classroom in the last week of term?
Yes, and it works better than a quiz does in that particular week, because there is no wrong answer and no child can be embarrassed by not knowing something. Three ways to run it. Put the two options on the board and have students physically move to one side of the room, which gets them out of their seats and gives you an instant visible result. Use one question as a five-minute writing prompt where they defend their choice in three sentences with a reason, which is a persuasive-writing exercise wearing a party hat. Or run it as a speaking exercise for English language learners, where the food and decorations rounds give a huge amount of concrete vocabulary in a low-stakes format. Start with the silly round.
What do I do about the person who refuses to choose?
Give them a count of five and then the table chooses for them, which is a worse outcome than choosing badly and cures the habit within two questions. The opposite problem is more common and more annoying: one person answering for everybody else. The house rule that fixes it is that you answer only for yourself, and anybody who answers for another person forfeits their own turn on that question. A third pattern to watch for is the contrarian who picks the obviously worse option to be interesting. Let them, once, and then ask them to justify it properly, which usually ends it.
Can I print these questions?
Yes. The page prints as a clean list with the follow-up lines included, free, with no account and nothing to sign up for. Printing beats passing a phone round a table, and it lets you hand a different round to each end of a long table and run two games at once. A printed sheet also survives a car, which a phone on twelve per cent battery does not.
How is this different from Christmas trivia?
Trivia rewards whoever already knows the most, which is fine for a quiz night and awkward at a table holding a six-year-old and a retired teacher. Would you rather has no right answer, so everybody starts level and the fun comes from the disagreement rather than the score. If you want both, run a round of Christmas trivia for the competitive half of the family and keep these for the part of the evening when nobody wants to move. They also work well back to back: trivia to wake a room up, would you rather to keep it talking.
